First and foremost, I have been having this internal battle over personal transparency versus personal privacy. There are some days where I think, "you know what.. I am going to openly blog about my life and my ups and downs. No filter. Everyone has their issues and sometimes reading about the lives of other relatable people is helpful and makes you feel a bit more 'normal'." But then there are the other days where I think, "Everyone is too public with their lives nowadays on social media. I should be mysterious and private. No one needs to know my business." Unable to decide which route I wanted to take, my blog just sat here.. for months.. without a post. I wrote a few entries, but never actually posted any of them. Which is silly because I am fairly certain no one reads my blog anyway. Regardless, today I decided to reenter my blog. So hello, nice to see you again and thanks for reading!
The second reason for my blog hiatus is because.... (wait for it)... I AM ENGAGED!!! Around the holidays, the most amazing man in the world asked me to be his wife and I have been on cloud nine ever since. Remember back when I thought I was destined to be a bitter bachelorette for the rest of my life? Yeah... life is funny. The moment I impulsively decided to leave everything that made me comfortable was the very moment that amazing things started to fall into place. I still remember sitting next to Robin in PALS (pediatric advanced life support) class and listening to her encourage me to leave Indy and do travel nursing. "During my first travel assignment I met my husband." She told me. Never in a million years did I think that that would also happen to me. Yet, here I am, planning a wedding. July 11, 2015 is the day I become Mrs. MacIntosh! I could not be happier!
Along with wedding planning, I have also been extremely busy with work lately. I have been trying to make my portfolio to get a $2/hr raise and have been spending a lot of time helping to initiate the CRRT program at my hospital. A lot of my free time has gone into work-related activities and I could really use a vacation! However, a vacation will have to wait because... (wait for it)... I AM GOING TO BE A DAY-SHIFTER AGAIN!! After a year of feeling miserable on nightshift, I am finally going to get to feel human again. I have been picking up shifts in the ER since July and a couple of weeks ago they offered me an 11a-11p position. That is my dream shift and I just could not bring myself to pass it up. I am a bit sad to be leaving the comfort of ICU and my awesome co-workers, but I am also excited to start a new adventure. I have never been an ER nurse before, so I am sure this year will be filled with many learning opportunities.
I was very nervous to tell my ICU manager and educator that I was leaving because I have invested so much time in getting the CRRT project up and running. I was afraid that I was going to get kicked out of that project and shunned because I chose to leave ICU. I hate feeling like I might let someone down. (My brain is ridiculous and often likes to jump to the worst case scenario.. Stupid brain..) Luckily for me, my manager and educator were super understanding and stated that they would allow me to continue the project as long as it were ok with the ER manager. I feel very blessed to work in such a supportive environment as all parties have been flexible in allowing me to continue to help. Although I will no longer be full-time in the ICU, I am so excited that I will still get to help with this project and teach the ICU nurses how to run CRRT. Hopefully everything will continue to go well on all fronts.
Obviously I have a lot of new and exciting things happening in 2014. I am a bit overwhelmed by it all. Overwhelmed in a good way, but it's still a lot of change. I think I am going to make 2014 my year of "letting it be". As you may know from reading my blog, with each new year I like to set an intention and a purpose for the days to come. 2013 was "Eat Healthier. Complain less. Love life more." I am not sure if I necessarily met the first two objectives, but I definitely loved life in 2013. So for 2014, I want to be relaxed and let the pieces fall where they may, without stressing out about it. No matter what happens in 2014, I am just going to let it be, be ok with it, and move on. No worry. No stress. Being a typically high-strung person, I think I owe that to myself this year.
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| He did an amazing job. So sparkly! |
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| So excited to marry this man! |
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| Somewhere along the line our puppy became a dog.. |
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| She's so majestic.. |
